Divorce may separate you from your spouse, but it does not have to cause a division between you and your children. Every family has a different approach to co-parenting. The most crucial aspect of any parenting plan, however, is to ensure the safety and stability of your children.
Birdnesting, explains Psychology Today, is a co-parenting method that allows your children to stay in the family home. You rotate visitation with your partner, but your children stay home.
Choose a second home
Birdnesting typically involves renting a second apartment or home. During your spouse’s time with your children, you stay at the second apartment and the two of you switch when it is time for you to return to the kids. Those with a high enough income may choose to have two separate living arrangements in addition to the family home.
Discuss privacy rules
To nest, you have to share space with your spouse. While you may be in the home at different times, you still have to discuss privacy. Discuss what areas may be off-limits to each other or what you expect of the other. For instance, if you have a private computer, you may not want your former spouse to use it when you are away.
Explain the reality clearly to your children
Talk to your children about the divorce. If you do not explain nesting to your kids, they may assume the two of you want to be together again. Your kids should have the same rules, regardless of the parent at home. Nesting allows for kids to maintain the same schedule, school and to continue their lives as they become accustomed to divorce.
Birdnesting is not permanent for most parents. Long-term birdnesting could give children the wrong idea that you want to get back together.